family fixit
I wish to express my concern over the disintegration of the family in California. It is generally agreed that the best situation for any child to be raised in, is a situation where a mother and father are present in the home. In fact, a quick Google search of the term “fatherless families” uncovers these disturbing facts:
- 63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes.
- 90% of all homeless and runaway children are from fatherless homes.
- 85% of all children that exhibit behavioral disorders come from fatherless homes.
- 80% of rapists motivated with displaced anger come from fatherless homes.
- 71% of all high school dropouts come from fatherless homes.
- 70% of juveniles in state operated institutions come from fatherless homes.
- 85% of all youths sitting in prisons grew up in a fatherless home.
- Nearly 2 of every 5 children in America do not live with their fathers.
In light of these facts, it is not possible to argue that the absence of a father in the home has no effect on the children of that home. It can also be assumed that removing the mother would have similar dire consequences.
It seems to me that many of our social ills, including illiteracy, poverty, domestic violence, high crime rates, and yes, even budget shortfalls and corrupt government could be solved by working to keep the family intact. It is not a quick or painless solution. A citizenry with short attentions spans and a society that demands quick fixes will lack the patience for the solution, but right minded government officials should pursue it none the less. What this country needs are government officials who champion the family, no matter how unpopular such a stance may be.
Once the importance of a mother and father are established in what is often called a “traditional” family, it becomes abundantly clear that the recent legalization of same sex marriage in California is a recipe for disaster. It’s reasonable to assume that many of these couples will also eventually desire children. While these children will be raised in two parent homes (provided the marriage proves solvent), they will be raised without the benefit of a father in the case of lesbian couples, or the benefit of a mother in the case of gay couples. This, in effect, dooms these children to many of the social ills listed above.
Obviously, not all of these children will grow to be ignorant criminals, such an assertion is absurd. Most will not. But why increase that chance? Future generations deserve the very best opportunities that we can afford to give them. Encouraging or delighting in same sex marriages is short sighted. It is recklessly engaging in social experimentation that has all the earmarks of failure. It is poor planning and poor judgement.
It seems American politics is little more than a popularity contest, and in an effort to be popular with a disproportionately loud segment of the population, political leaders are throwing away the future. But what about the majority? Who hears their voice? In March of 2000, California Proposition 22, which defines marriage in California as only between a man and a woman, was passed with a majority vote of 61.4%. Yet, some how, the majority voice has been silenced, and same sex marriages have been legalized.
In 1762, J. J. Rousseau, in his work On Social Contract, (Book IV, Chapter 1) warned us about silencing the majority voice:
But when the social bond begins to grow slack and the state to grow weak, when private interests begin to make themselves felt and small societies begin to influence the larger one, the common interest deteriorates and encounters opponents, unanimity no longer prevails in the voting, the general will is no longer the will of all, contradictory views and arguments arise, and the best advice is not accepted without disputes.
Finally, when the state, on the brink of ruin, subsists only in an empty and illusory form, when the social bond is broken in every heart, and when the meanest interest brazenly flaunts the sacred name of the public good, then the general will becomes mute; everyone, guided by secret motives, expresses opinions no more like those of a citizen than if the state had ever existed, and iniquitous decrees, which have no other end than the private interest, are falsely passed under the name of laws.
The phrases “small societies” and “private interests” are particularly important when one considers that according to the 2000 US Census Bureau, only 1.51% of couples are same sex couples (gaydemographics.org).
Once cannot consider the disintegration of the family without considering the moral aspects as well. The following quote is from Benjamin Franklin, from a speech given during the Constitutional Convention.
I have lived, Sir, a long time and the longer I live, the more convincing proofs I see of this truth — that God governs in the affairs of men. And if a sparrow cannot fall to the ground without his notice, is it probable that an empire can rise without his aid? We have been assured, Sir, in the sacred writings that “except the Lord build they labor in vain that build it.” I firmly believe this; and I also believe that without his concurring aid we shall succeed in this political building no better than the Builders of Babel: We shall be divided by our little partial local interests; our projects will be confounded, and we ourselves shall be become a reproach and a bye word down to future age. And what is worse, mankind may hereafter this unfortunate instance, despair of establishing Governments by Human Wisdom, and leave it to chance, war, and conquest.
I therefore beg leave to move — that henceforth prayers imploring the assistance of Heaven, and its blessings on our deliberations, be held in this Assembly every morning before we proceed to business, and that one or more of the Clergy of this City be requested to officiate in that service.
A nation is only as strong as its families. If Benjamin Franklin understood that this great Nation could not be built without Divine help, why are we so arrogant as to assume we can address the question of family without that same help? Wise and thoughtful leaders should often seek the aid of Heaven when wrestling with social questions such as these. To do any less is to disdain the very principles upon which our country was founded.
Major religions of the day have helped provided inspired guidance on the topics of family and marriage.
In November 2003, U.S Catholic Bishops released a statement on family. It reads in part:
Marriage, as instituted by God, is a faithful, exclusive, lifelong union of a man and a woman joined in an intimate community of life and love. They commit themselves completely to each other and to the wondrous responsibility of bringing children into the world and caring for them. The call to marriage is woven deeply into the human spirit. Man and woman are equal. However, as created, they are different from but made for each other. This complementarity, including sexual difference, draws them together in a mutually loving union that should be always open to the procreation of children (see Catechism of the Catholic Church [CCC], nos. 1602-1605).
In 1995, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (“Mormons”) released their “Proclamation on the Family”. It reads in part:
All human beings—male and female—are created in the image of God. Each is a beloved spirit son or daughter of heavenly parents, and, as such, each has a divine nature and destiny. Gender is an essential characteristic of individual premortal, mortal, and eternal identity and purpose. […]
The family is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan. Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity. […]
We warn that individuals who violate covenants of chastity, who abuse spouse or offspring, or who fail to fulfill family responsibilities will one day stand accountable before God. Further, we warn that the disintegration of the family will bring upon individuals, communities, and nations the calamities foretold by ancient and modern prophets. […]
I believe that our great Nation stands at a pivotal moment in history. We can choose to redefine family and invite on ourselves all the social ills that go along with doing so, or we can choose to uphold the traditional family institution, an institution that for thousands of years has proven its worth and value to mankind.
It is my hope and prayer that as you and other wise government leaders grapple with these and other important social issues, that you will seek the aid of Heaven. Without it, we cannot hope to succeed, with it, we can only move to greater heights. The institution of marriage, and the preservation of the “traditional” family are central to the preservation of our government and Nation.
Regards,
Scott Thompson
Comment from Jane Thompson
Time July 28, 2008 at 7:32 pm
Scott, this is an amazing letter. I am very proud of you and the way you have expressed your opinions.